Golden Gate 50k

Sometimes I forget. I forget that 31miles (or in the case of Saturday, 31.8) is a long ass way. I forget that my feet will be sore. And I fail to recall that sensation of replacing my muddy Salomon's with a pair of flips-flops, wiggling my muddy toes and feet, until that moment is there again. It’s been a year since my last 50k. I’ve seen a bit more pavement in the last year then I’ve seen the Headlands or even Redwood Park for that matter.

Transitioning back to the trails after the Olympic trials proved to me that what I do on the trails isn’t easy. That running up and down hills can be just as challenging, if not more so, than keeping an even steady pace. I hiked a lot more hills in those first few weeks, my legs were still causing me discomfort, and there was also the reality that, well, my legs were now accustomed to flat terrain. So, like any normal person I got frustrated and doubtful. But, I let go of the watch, stopped questioning my stop and go on hills, and I just kept trying to remember why I love the trails. I really questioned why I used to say I loved the hills, but I remember now. And, I do love them.

I signed-up for Coastal Trail’s Golden Gate 50k to remember what a 50k felt like, to remember what I am capable of, and to just run in the Headlands again. So that’s just what I did this past Saturday. I just went out and cruised without urgency, anxiety, or doubt. And thank goodness, my body remembered how to manage 6,000 feet of climbing and four hours on my feet. And, I uncovered a few things:

-Peanut Butter & Plain GU are my new favorites.
-Mud on Pirates Cove is dangerous --- thank goodness for the long weeds, which kept me standing (I probably tore at least twenty out of the ground as I braced near to close falls.)
-I like chasing guys. I need to work on chasing girls or at least not being afraid of it).
-Flip-flops are amazing!
-I love Epsom salt baths & crosswords. They’re the essential after-party.
-Marincello is fun the first time through. The second time it’s just well, it’s just different.
-I still find the Headlands absolutely magical.

Oh poor hamstrings, I love you, and welcome back!

So anyhow, it is good to be back spending time on the trails. I think I’ll still find a little space for the pavement. But, yup it feels pretty good being back.

What Makes me Cry...

Apparently both alien babies and computer-generated chimps make me cry. I know, not the most riveting or real, but seriously I was a mess during District 9 and Planet of the Apes. Something about kids, or better said, creatures, being taken from their home just wrecks me. Kids in general just wake me up to the world. Just last week, I was taking a walk with a friend of mine around Lake Merritt and we came upon this little girl with the biggest smile just waddling along. Happy to move her two little feet as the mother closely followed behind, bracing for a potential fall. Both of is instantly thought of the same thing: “damn, to be that happy.” And, then we grow-up, get tainted, rant a lot more than we laugh and smile, get frustrated by the stupidest shit, honk are horns, flip people off… Ok, ok, I know not all the time, but you get the gist.

When I was teaching dance classes to preschoolers I had my hands full. But, I also got, “teacher Caitlin I peed my pants.” As I frantically stopped the music, rushed over to take her hand, she said, “it’s ok, I was just having so much fun, I didn’t want to stop dancing.” Or there was the day I asked for the rules during dance class and I received, “don’t put your hand in water where there are sharks.” The best part about this comment was the other kids reactions. They all nodded vigorously like it was the absolute best rule ever. These adorable moments have stuck with me. This is why I have kept my pre-Olympic Trials message from my nephew, which says in a raspy voice, “run fasttt.” I listen to it when I just need a smile.

And truth be told, when I’m having a bad day, or doubts during a race, or about ready to cuss out someone that didn’t turn their turn indicator on (1. yes, I call it a turn indicator not a blinker & 2. why do people feel it’s unnecessary to use these devices in the bay area?), I think about being grateful to move, listen, and interact. Some days I do better than others, some days I have to think about certain things like my nephew calling my running shoes race cars, or that hug I’ll get at the end of a long day. Regardless, it’s pretty important to take a look around and not take everything so seriously...